Last week I was at Bible Study when I heard something that really stuck with me “Just because they aren’t for you doesn’t mean they are a bad a person” Sounds like a simple thought for most; but for me personally I have a really tough time cutting people off who are generally good and probably GREAT mates for someone else. Learning to tactfully trim people from your life is essential no matter how good they are especially when it comes to matters of the heart. The trick is letting the people go for real not just sending them on a sabbatical.
I will finally go on record and say Little Miss Asshole would be an outstanding woman for a girl who can deal with her. I am almost certain I am not that girl. She is sensitive, attractive, gainfully employed, loves to shop, well spoken, educated, likes shoes and really finds joy in purchasing them for her mate etc. However it’s not a package that will keep me satisfied. It’s like this: women are like food some are main courses (the protein), others are side dishes (girls that are good little side pieces but won’t ever be enough on their own), while some are desserts (yummy little fun girls), and others are buffets (take what you want leave what you don’t but keep in mind someone has been breathing all over it). If you understand this doctrine you know that you shouldn’t just have protein or just desert. I am NOT LOOKING for a mate but if I were to happen upon one just know she will HAVE to be a full course meal. So is Little Miss Asshole’s Package a bad one? Nah- it’s just I’m not the intended recipient! Imagine opening your Grandma’s year supply of Depends during Christmas- totally practical for her, but you have complete control over your urine and bowels so you don’t need them!
Letting someone you know deep down isn’t good for you for whatever the reason doesn’t mean they are an awful person it just means that they aren’t your “forever”. It takes an incredible sense of discernment to be able to do this correctly. Trust me I know- I’ve cut people off both far too soon and far too late. Like Kanye said in ‘Heard em Say’ “They say people in ya life are seasons- and anything happen it’s for a reason”.
My feelings are best expressed in song
Heard Em Say- Kaye West
till next time…
Ok, I’m back- yes after yet another hiatus. I really needed to collect my thoughts and quite frankly get my love life together. Let me give y’all a quick catch up. I started back dating Little Miss Asshole, she moved in and everything. Things still just couldn’t work out; I don’t think either of us was fully committed to making things peaceful, so it was a constant warzone. She promptly moved out and into a living situation I’m just not a fan of (I’m sorry that I’m not sorry!) Enter Little Miss Baby Gap. She is just as pretty as she wants to be, body is amazing however mama is 5 years my junior. What she lacks in honesty, fidelity and maturity she makes up in gaped toothed smiles that just melt my heart.
So now that y’all are basically caught up let’s talk present day. I’m single like a dollar bill and it’s the top of the year; you know how MFs be on that “New year, new me bull”? I was sort of inspired by this faulty notion- “New year, new dating perspective”. Let’s be honest ya girl isn’t getting ANY younger… So I have no time to play with, coach or tutor these bitches. I know where my standards are, however, I only have two “rules” when it comes to dating 1. No puss on the first date 2. Don’t go “cannon balling” in to love- just stick your toe in. I for one have NO interest in being the same fool twice. With all that said I’ve decided to give myself 2014 dating resolutions.
2014 dating Resolutions
- Live right now, you can’t compare these new gals to ya old heads. You can’t expect them to love you whole heartedly like Little Miss One Who Got Away. Or have the “fuck with me you know I got itness” of Little Miss Crazytown
- Don’t make excuses for these females, and while you’re at it- don’t accept theirs
- No matter how horny you get she can’t get the puss until she has stimulated your mind and won your heart.
- Remember to close one door fully before you open another
- Don’t be bitter, but don’t forget what you’ve learned from bitter woman R&B classics such as Sunshine Anderson’s “Heard it All before” and Fantasia’s “Free Yourself”
- Does she support your dreams, does she have aspirations you can support?
- Remember these bitches show you who they are in week one don’t ignore that shit.
- Is she just a “fungirl” if yes, no big deal- just treat her as such
- Quit cooking for these chicks- your cooking is REMARKABLE not everyone deserves it!
- Remember in the words of O.C Allen III “at this point in my life I’m looking for faucets- not toilets”. Meaning I need someone who’s adding to my life not someone who just a receptacle for pee and poo
- Is she your intellectual equal or higher? If nah- bye girl
- Despite my foul mouth I have a very strong relationship with my God. From here on out I gotta require that my mate has one too- if not do you want to work on your spirituality? I can’t have a spirituality void person in my life again. I go back and forth on if I only see myself with someone with the same religious affiliations as me.
I think that will do it; I mean God only needed 10 commandments who do I think I am to have 12 resolutions? Well I hope someone besides me will hold be accountable for this- I mean that’s kinda the purpose of this.
I will post again soon-
My feelings are best expressed through song: Here I Go Again- White Snake